the {other} side of the coin

Today was much harder than I thought it would be.  I think MSS' closing became more 'real' to me once all of our customers and friends began to find out.    And sometimes it can be so easy to get wrapped up in the sadness and all that comes with it, that I forget there is another side to this.

It's the side that will give me more time.

For the past few months, I have spent a lot of time feeling overwhelmed and stressed.  Many things at my 'day job' were heating up, and I needed to step up my game there.  Every day, we are expected to do more and more; but unlike the atmosphere for so long there, there is no longer the sense that this will only be for a few days, weeks, or months.  This is it.  This is how it is now.

All of that said, I would come home from work tired - physically and emotionally - and later than before (right now I get home at about 8:00 most nights).  And there were so many things that I needed to do at home.  The list never seemed to get any shorter.

So, it is my plan and goal, to see the other side of losing this job that I enjoyed, where I got to work with people that I really, really liked.  These are the things that I am 'getting' back:

• My Saturdays.  To sleep late, to get up early, to hang around the house, to relax, to do housework.
• Time with my sweetie.  More evenings that I can be craft-free.  More Saturdays when we can plan to do something together.  (He works most Saturdays.) 
• Scrapbooking for the pleasure of doing it.  It is sad to say, but I haven't scrapped a single page all year that was not for a class or some other project.
• Money in my checking account.  Although not proven, I think that I will be better able to stick to my budget if I am not actually in a scrapbook store for 4 or more hours each weekend.
• Less wear and tear on my car.  I think the 70 miles round trip to work there helped me reach 119K much faster than if I weren't doing that once or twice each weekend.  And, that also helps me to have more money in my checking account, too.
• More time to hang out with friends who are not customers. Maybe we can revive girls day out again.  Lunch, movies, and shopping.  Sans our other halves.  And, sad to say, I have a dear friend whose daughter is 18 months old, I haven't managed to see her yet.  That definitely goes on the list for this summer.
• The general sense of having a weekend.  I think that God had a very good reason behind a day or two of rest each week.  It always feels so much better to return to the office on Monday when I've been able to satisfy some personal need on the weekend - even if it's just staying in my pajamas and reading all day.

I know that there are so many things that I will miss about working at MSS.  But, there are so many things that I am getting back, too.  Here's to embracing the change.

~me

Comments

[heidi]

It's funny... a couple of those same sentiments have crossed my mind in the past 24 hours or so... especially the scrapbooking for fun (heck, maybe we'll even crop again!), defintely the less mileage thing and of course more time with Brian!

[Mary]

You have such a terrific positive attitude!! Good for you!

[Sue]

You know, Leah, we as customers take you guys so much for granted. It's my selfish side that is really upset about the store closing. There will be other stores where I can satisfy my addiction - it will also be better for my wallet. But I'm hoping we will be able to maintain our friendships outside of the store in a "non-working" environment with some kind of social get-togethers. You all are the best and are well-deserving of "me" time!